As children bring their broken toys
With tears for us to mend,
I brought my broken dreams to God
Because He was my friend.
But then instead of leaving Him
In peace to work alone,
I hung around and tried to help
With ways that were my own.
At last I snatched them back and cried,
"How could you be so slow?"
"My child," He said, "what could I do?"
"You never did let go."
Addendum -- Matthew 14:31
"Immediately Jesus reached out
his hand and caught him.
You of little faith, he said,
why did you doubt?"
If I was to die this hour
Where would I be headed
Would I be going to hell
or would I be going to heaven
Thoughts go through my mind
if there even is a heaven
if God really exists
if I should believe in the Reugrend
But then it occurs to me
That in Jesus Christ I believe
That life would not be complete
Without him guiding me
Jesus is the light
Jesus is free
Jesus is love
He lives within me
How long is too long
For God to answer prayer?
Consider Sarah, Elizabeth and me.
We prayed for children, many years, all three.
People laughed and made scorn.
But after 23 years my child was born.
Miracle baby - that's what he is.
Sent from God, precious jewel of his.
Joshua Caleb is his name.
Devoted men to God was their fame.
I hope someday
His life will touch.
Others with his gentleness.
Reminding all to God does call.
He answers prayers both great and small.
To my son in whom I'm well pleased
Like becoming the dream
the perfect reality
that stirs inside each of us
being and always becoming
new.
Fluid in motion
moving into the cells
the blood thick
and red with it
carrying its light to each orifice
to become life
radiating from each pore.
Extending, and reaching,
and welcoming each stranger.
Until the smile,
the brightness of the eyes
depicts the perfect reality,
the undaunted joy that exists
in the spirit.
Alone of God and man.
To be understood completely
only by these.
To be accepted
only by those
whom without words know,
are familiar with
the poetry, the sincerity,
the depth, and the warmth,
of a soul with no need for explanation.
Merely with discernment,
distinction, perception.
With love
for the pure simplicity of it,
the guiding, lilting, sweet light of it.
The newness, and the fullness of it.
The ancient surety
faith of God
that knows the soul
that is touched and blessed by it.
A contradiction in terms
to be me
and to be without words.
I'm sitting here filled with wonder
At the amazing things you do
How the waters stay in the oceans
And the vast beauty of the view
How the stars are hung in the sky
Within them is written your word
How we are the following sheep
And you are the only Shepherd
How the sky is painted with color
Bursts of orange in the sunset glow
How much knowledge it took to make
And how little us humans know
How intricately you planned it
There was nothing you left unthought
From the delicacy of a baby
To all the sins of ours you bought
There's no other love that's out there
As deep and as faithful and true
No other comfort to be found
Because nothing compares to you
Nothing compares to your miracles
Or the listening time you spend
How you always take good care of us
And our broken hearts that you mend
To us, our problems like mountains
To you, they're no problem at all
You're ever so watchful and there
To help catch us, when we do fall
I'm just sitting here filled with wonder
At the awesome things that you do
At being our Lord and Savior
Because nothing compares to You!
wha..... another lotus.... =) soooo nicee...
TGIF Today God Is First, by Os Hillman
And Elisha prayed, "O Lord, open his eyes so he may see." Then the Lord opened the servant's eyes, and he looked and saw the hills full of horses and chariots of fire all around Elisha. - 2 Kings 6:17
Elisha was counseling the nation of Israel against the impending attack of the king of Aram. The Lord supernaturally gave Elisha the plans that the king was implementing, and in turn, Elisha warned Israel of each intended attack. The king could not understand why his plans were continually foiled. It seemed there was a secret informer in his midst. He was furious when he was told it was the God of Israel who was to blame for this inside information. The king decided the only way to resolve the situation was to get rid of the problem - kill Elisha.
The king's forces arrived and surrounded Elisha and his servant. Elisha's servant became upset and fearful when Elisha was not upset. Elisha immediately prayed that his servant's eyes might be opened to see that there was no need to be afraid, because the angels were protecting them.
And Elisha prayed, "O Lord, open his eyes so he may see." Then the Lord opened the servant's eyes, and he looked and saw the hills full of horses and chariots of fire all around Elisha. As the enemy came down toward him, Elisha prayed to the Lord, "Strike these people with blindness." So He struck them with blindness, as Elisha had asked (2 Kings 6:17-18).
Who is the Elisha in your life? Do you have a mentor friend who can see the activity of God in your life when you cannot see it? We all need to have somebody we can trust to help us see the activity of God. It is often difficult for us to see what God is really doing because we are so consumed by the circumstances of the moment. Ask God today to help open your spiritual eyes that you might see Him in your circumstances.
This was captured on 31 March 06.... ( late posting... )
Today's Prayer
March 31, 2006
Dear God, Please increase my desire for Your Word and help me to always make time for prayer and Bible study, that I may study to show myself approved unto You, a worker that does not need to be ashamed, rightly dividing the Word of truth. I want to know Your Word and hide it in my heart, so that it will be there and come to my memory whenever it is needed, in whatever circumstance I may use it to exhort others, instruct others, rebuke the darkness, and discern what is right. I do not want to be ashamed from lack of knowledge, but blessed by knowledge of Your Word--and ready to share it at all times. Thank You God, for Your Word of truth and for the Word of Life. In Jesus' name I pray, amen. (based on 2 Timothy 2:15)
An Eternal View of Circumstances
TGIF Today God Is First, by Os Hillman
Now I want you to know, brothers, that what has happened to me has really served to advance the gospel. - Philippians 1:12
Are your life circumstances advancing the gospel? Can you see the Lord's hand in your life in such a way that all of your life experiences, joys, sorrows, hardships, and training have resulted in advancing the gospel?
Paul was a tentmaker by trade. But he had an overall ministry objective in his business life. That objective left him imprisoned and persecuted at times. But Paul saw these events not as roadblocks to his mission. Rather, they were catalysts to advancing the cause of Christ. Paul's revelation of this kept him from despairing about his circumstances.
One day a little-known pastor who lived in the small African nation of Benin began to pray for his Marxist president. For two years he prayed. Then the Lord told the pastor to go to meet this president and share the gospel with him. The president rejected the gospel, but after another such occasion, the president accepted the gospel and became a Christian. He was removed from power but was discipled by this pastor. Sometime later this same president was elected again. Today that president is now a Christian leader of a nation committed to spreading the gospel throughout his nation. One man - yet millions have been affected by his obedience. This modern-day story is retold in countless lives of those willing to live for a cause greater than themselves.
Are your work and life experiences serving to advance the gospel? What experiences has God allowed in your life that are part of His plan to advance the gospel? Ask Him to help you see your life the way He sees it. Seeing our life the way God sees it will help us avoid discouragement in those times when life appears to be a mystery to us.
ADDRESS:
Heaven
FEATURES:
Many rooms with a master suite
Spacious love
Open floor plan for peace
Large eat-in grace
Fenced in mercy with room for expansion
Son room with a marvelous view of salvation
Pool of milk and honey in the back
Pearly gates in front
DIRECTIONS:
The only way to the Father is through the Son
PRICE:
$0.00 - Calvary - Owner financing
COMMUNITY:
Friendly angelic neighbors
Great family and friends
Praise the Lord all day and night
BONUS:
Crown of stars, new luxurious robe
Golden slippers with matching wings
Bring a friend and get a reward
For more information, call your local agent or representative.
Name, address and phone number listed below:
NAME: Jesus Christ
ADDRESS: Repent Highway and Streets of Gold
PHONE: Dial John 3:16
Author: Pam Ryans
In my Father's house are
many mansions; if it were not so,
I would have told you. I go to
prepare a place for you.
And if I go and prepare a place
for you, I will come again, and
receive you unto myself, that
where I am, there ye may be also.
John 14: 2-3
Source: Wanda's country home
..."If I want him to remain alive until I return, what is that to you? You must follow Me." - John 21:22
Jesus was talking to Peter after he had just had a very important encounter with Him-one of the last meetings the two would have. This was the third time Jesus had shown Himself to the disciples after His resurrection. It is the famous dialogue between Jesus and Peter in which Jesus asked Peter three times if he loved Him. Jesus followed by commanding, "Feed My sheep." Jesus went on to foretell of Peter's future death. As they were walking together, John was with Peter and Jesus. Peter asked Jesus about John and whether he would die also. Jesus reacted sharply to Peter's comment, telling him not to worry about what John's role or purpose was in life. All Peter had to do was worry about fulfilling his own purpose.
As workplace believers we tend to measure our success on whether we have achieved a certain position or stature in life. Even as Christians the temptation to believe that someone is blessed if they have achieved prominence is always confronting us. In His discussion with Peter, Jesus was getting at the very heart of the matter of a person's calling. Peter was worried about whether his friend John was going to get the same lot in life as he was. Jesus told him it should not be his concern. He was to concern himself only with one thing: his own calling before God.
Are you tempted to compare yourself with where others are in their life? Are you dissatisfied with where God has you right now? Be of good cheer-"[be] confident of this, that He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus" (Phil. 1:6).
But blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord, whose confidence is in Him. - Jeremiah 17:7
Have you ever considered at what point a test becomes so difficult that you decide you can no longer trust in God and you must take over to solve the problem? The prophet Jeremiah describes a situation in which the temptation to solve a financial problem can become so great that we trust in man's way to solve it.
This is what the Lord says: "Cursed is the one who trusts in man, who depends on flesh for his strength and whose heart turns away from the Lord. He will be like a bush in the wastelands; he will not see prosperity when it comes. He will dwell in the parched places of the desert, in a salt land where no one lives. But blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord, whose confidence is in Him. He will be like a tree planted by the water that sends out its roots by the stream. It does not fear when heat comes; its leaves are always green. It has no worries in a year of drought and never fails to bear fruit" (Jeremiah 17:5-8).
Jeremiah drew a sharp comparison between the man who trusts in his own effort to solve his problem and the man who trusts in God when he cannot see the outcome. The man who trusts in God bears fruit despite the circumstances in his life. He does not shrivel when the heat comes; in fact, his roots go deeper into God's grace. He continues to bear fruit in spite of his circumstances.
Recently, a friend from South Africa explained to me that whenever a plant lives in an arid climate, the roots drive deeper and deeper into the soil to get the water they need. This forces the plant to develop a root system that is far beyond the normal plant because it is forced to go deeper to gain the water it needs. Sometimes God forces us to go deeper into the grace of His love in order to build a greater foundation in our own lives. These lean times are designed to accomplish this in us. If you find yourself in this condition, ask the Lord who provides the water for our soul for the grace you need today to continue to bear fruit in the desert.
The Cross
In evil long I took delight,
Unawed by shame or fear,
Till a new object struck my sight,
And stopped my wild career.
I saw One hanging on a tree,
In agonies and blood;
He fixed His languid eyes on me,
As near His cross I stood.
Sure never till my latest breath,
Shall I forget that look!
It seemed to charge me with His death,
Though not a word He spoke.
A second look He gave, which said,
"I freely all forgive;
This blood is for thy ransom paid;
I die that thou mayest live."
Thus while His death my sin displays
In all its blackest hue,
Such is the mystery of grace,
It seals my pardon too!
—John Newton
The Bright Forever
Breaking through the clouds that gather,
O'er the Christian's natal skies,
Distant beams, like floods of glory,
Fill the soul with glad surprise;
And we almost hear the echo
Of the pure and holy throng,
In the bright, the bright forever,
In the summer land of song.
Yet a little while we linger,
Ere we reach our journey's end;
Yet a little while of labor,
Ere the evening shades descend;
Then we'll lay us down to slumber,
But the night will soon be o'er;
In the bright, the bright forever,
We shall wake, to weep no more.
O the bliss of life eternal!
O the long unbroken rest!
In the golden fields of pleasure,
In the region of the blessed;
But, to see our dear Redeemer,
And before His throne to fall,
There to bear His gracious welcome,
Will be sweeter far than all.
—Fanny Crosby
I will give you the treasures of darkness, riches stored in secret places, so that you may know that I am the Lord, the God of Israel, who summons you by name. - Isaiah 45:3
"I have never been in this place before. It is new ground for me, and I find I am way out of my comfort zone. I am scared to death to trust Him at this level. I had to confess to the Lord I have not been able to accept or believe His love for me in this area." Those were the words I expressed to a friend when I was in a difficult place in my life. That day when I confessed those words, God led me to this passage of Scripture.
What we perceive as dark periods in our lives are designed to be treasures from God. They are actually riches stored in secret places. We cannot see those times in this light because of the often-accompanying pain or fear that prevents us from accepting these times as treasures. They have a particular purpose from God's viewpoint: "...so that you may know that I am the Lord...who summons you by name."
You see, unless we are cast into times in which we are completely at God's mercy for breakthroughs in our lives, we will never experience God's faithfulness in those areas. We will never know how personal He is, or that He can be trusted to meet the deepest needs in our lives. God wants each of us to know that we are "summoned by name." Every hair of our head is numbered. He knows every activity we are involved in. His love for you and me knows no bounds, and He will take every opportunity to demonstrate this to us.
Has God brought you into a place of darkness? Trust Him today to reveal that hidden treasure that can be found in this darkness. Let Him summon you by name.
The earth is the Lord's, and everything in it, the world, and all who live in it; for He founded it upon the seas and established it upon the waters. - Psalm 24:1-2
As Christian workplace believers, God calls us to view Him as the owner of everything. We are to be stewards of all that He entrusts to us. This is one of the hardest of all commandments to follow for the Christian workplace believer because, if we work hard at business, we receive all the benefits of that work. It appears as though all that we have achieved was through our hand. Yet God says that it is by His hand that we are able to make wealth (see Deut. 8). He is the source of that ability. As soon as we become owners and not managers, we fall into trouble with God.
Joseph understood that he was a steward of all the resources of Egypt. God promoted him to affect an entire region of the world. Joseph had more power, prestige, and wealth than any 30-year-old who ever lived before him. The temptation for him in this newfound role in life must have been great. Many a man has not been able to handle material success. Many of God's choicest servants began well in their calling and service to God only to fail at the end. Consider Hezekiah, the great king who achieved many great things but failed to acknowledge God's blessing at the end of his reign. His reign was cut short due to pride. Gideon's fate was similar. Success can lead to pride if we are not careful.
"Not every man can carry a full cup. Sudden elevation frequently leads to pride and a fall. The most exacting test of all to survive is prosperity" [Oswald Chambers].
Ask the Lord today if you are living as a steward or an owner. Put whatever skills and resources you possess on His altar. Then you can expect God to do great things through you.
Why do I bother going on like this
There is no meaning anymore
Day by day, week by week
It all blends into one
I have no idea what's going on
Every day I stumble on
Not knowing where I'm headed
The same faces same places
It all blends into one
I have no idea what's going on
I have no idea why I'm so fucked up
All I want to do is die
There's blackness outside
blackness caged inside with me
my view from here
does not surpass my fingers
the day ascends, plateaus, and falls
It hoists and drags, and I allow
sometimes light appears before tomorrow
but it's only dreamt
and when breakfast faces get a glimpse
they turn away
they think I just might be contagious...
REALITY IS RELATIVE
I read of time and space...
One having measurement,
The other, place.
Ninety degrees to time
Lies reality extended,
Along postulated lines.
Parallels are allowed no being,
In space trimensional.
We're not really seeing,
At odd unmeasured angles left and right,
The proposed dimension four,
Wanders out of time and sight.
Captured In A Bottle
Author: Clive B Ringshall
In a bottle I’ll keep this very moment,
In my heart I’ll save our every beat,
Through my eyes I’ll capture your glow,
Through my eyes I’ll see you forever,
Through friendship we became much closer,
Our touch bought us together,
Our minds are locked in pleasure,
Our minds remember that feeling,
Our souls forever entwined,
A moment in time I’ll never forget
A moment my heart skipped a beat,
A moment I fell in love,
A moment when us two became only one,
I look at you and will always remember,
I feel your heart cry out my name,
I hold your hand to comfort,
I see your face that lights up my soul
All these times I keep so safe,
All these moments I hold so dear,
All these memories I captured in a bottle
Awake-asleep we have dreamed all life long
absorbed with our self-created precious images.
Isn't now the time to wake up into reality? - Beyond.
Better now before the card house of wishful thinking
will let collapse our hopes in despair and misery.
Leaving us dismantled, falling into void of lost
with nothing left except pain and suffering.
Longing, urged for never experienced wholeness
used by tricksters for clever manipulations
keeping us busy to strive for promising toys.
Being puppets in a monstrous world wide game
used to feed blown up selfish power needs.
Let's step out of endless unaware dependencies
bound to pictures of lack from our lost childhood.
Let's become aware that each of us is capable
to make decisions, out of being aware of ego games:
eating, doing, buying, thinking - what others sell.
Feeding a monster which will never have enough
Let's not waste our energy in trying to fight it
see the root inside ourselves - that's all to be done
become aware how we are trapped in substitutes.
Desperation - the sensation of impotence appears
since long suppressed and swept under the rug
by self protecting ignorance and survival techniques.
Giving space to look closely at what is in front of us
withdrawing ourselves from all blinding distraction
a quiet observer appears - centered in one's heart
we might discover an unknown 'free sense of Being'.
When realizing that today might be our last day
then clinging on worn out securities loosens up
future vanishes - what remains is here right now.
Fearless strength to look through arises from within
giving clearness to respond to what shows up
related in bright light to an unveiled new reality
nothing more left to loose - we might as well go on
It turns out that we are existing in a second hand life
trying to live concepts by adding color to drawings.
Reality is colored by itself - although uncontrolled chaotic.
We wanted to change ourselves - it never happened
now as established values are crashing and collapsing
we can't conserve our image of a happy lifestyle:
'respecting and being respected' in precious self pictures.
Let's take over at the wheel of self responsibility
now having gained the power to change things around us
because we have finally changed ourselves at core.
Let us be surprised from an unveiled light of reality
showing a new born world - we may learn to deal with
without being told what to do, without thinking tracks
- arising from old ashes before we get burned...
Will he call???? Probably not......
Will he write???? Probably not....
Does he care???? Probably not....
Face Reality....
NO!!!!!!
I don't want to face Reality...
It hurts too bad....
I'll just go back to...
"DREAMWORLD".....
It's not too bad in....
"FANTASY LAND"....
It's neat!!!!
Everything is okey....
And, whatever you imagine to be...
IS.....
YES!! YES!!!
"DREAMWORLD"
Here I am...
Safe.... Again....
It's my life
I do what i want
I throw the dice
And wait
It's my time
Whats done is done
I did the crime
I'll pay the price
It's my love
I fell to deep
They killed my white dove
My heart forever bleeds
Blood creates a reality
I never noticed before
Nobody really notices
My own private war
I sit and think and wonder
About living life each day
I wonder if i really am
Or am i just wasting away?
The marks on my arms are a reality
They might not ever go away
They show me that my doing this has consequences
No matter what they say
I stop and i think and i wonder
About how this will effect me
As a person as a friend as a sister
Will this ever leave me be
My friends worrying is a reality
I care about them so much
I don't want them to be mad
But i meet something sharp's touch
I stop and i think and i wonder
About how they think of me
Whether they'll call it quits
Or will they never leave me be
Me feeling dizzy creates this reality
I might of gone too far
Blood is gushing from my arm
Blackness covers me in bars
I stop and i think and i wonder
Am i really dying?
Is this really real?
I think about the ones who love me
And then no more do i feel...
Brought up on suspicion,
And a pain that doesn't die,
Im locked in inhibition,
While im fighting whats inside.
Lost in hesitation,
Afraid to truly live,
Im awaiting indication,
On how much more to give.
Flawlessly displayed,
My unseen reality,
I was never who I am,
Im who Im made to be.
Told to stay the same,
Reluctant to arrange,
But that could be the problem,
People never change.
With every touch
I see your face
With every smile
You give with grace
With every kiss
The feeling grows
With every memory
Your love shows
When you said 'Hello'
I about died
When you asked
I lied
When you said the three words
I thought you couldn't
When you said 'Goodbye'
I thought you wouldn't
You walked into my life,
not knowing what to expect.
The anger and darkness that filled me frightened you,
but something kept you from leaving me.
Not knowing why you're still here,
your mind is a roller coaster of thoughts,
and feelings you never expected,
But strangely you never wanted them to end.
I could see your feelings grow for me;
the lust in your eyes cannot be mistaken,
with each day it grows more and more,
like the moon in the night's sky.
You're still confused on why you stay,
Knowing that your life could end at any moment.
The danger you're in, from just being with me,
excites you in a way you never knew existed.
What you don't realize is that I know what you are feeling;
you generally love me for the person I am.
What you don't know is that I am not a person at all,
but a creature of the night, a creature that could kill you at any moment.
And yet I let you stay, knowing what I could do,
I fear that I might have feelings for you.
They grow with each passing moment of time we spend together,
but I could never let it go too far, for you would never come back.
So as I watch you, and see your love grow for me,
I know that soon you will be gone forever.
And somehow you know this too,
but you're not afraid you're numbed by your lust for me.
As I watch you die, knowing I could have stopped it,
I tell myself that you meant nothing, but we both know that's not true,
I truly loved you and look at what I did to you.
You told me that you loved me
why did you leave me to cry in the cold
you swore this time was different
why does that line seem so old
You told me I was the only one
who could make you feel that way
you told me that you cared about me
so why didnt you stay
All the nights you laid with me
alone in the dark in my bed
now I finally realize
you were just messing with my head
Love is such a powerful word
a word people often misuse
something they take for granted
something they beat and abuse
My wounds run deep inside me
there's blood all over the place
I think I’ve really lost it this time
Im ashamed to show my face
I wonder if he remembers me
Or if I'm just a memory
I wonder if he thinks of us
Or if he finds it useless
I wonder how things would be
If he had never left me
I wonder how he is
And if I'm still a love of his
I think about him everyday
And wonder if he's okay
I think about how happy we were
And the memories make the tears stir
I think about the plans we made
While we were laying in the shade
I think about all we said
And the lives we lead
To not know
Where to go
To not know where to find
A place where he may hide
To not be able to see his face
Puts my heart so out of place
To not know when he's near
Is my greatest fear
There's so much in my head
That I wish I'd said
There's so many missed kisses
For my unanswered wishes
There's only so many ways
For me to make it through the days
There's so little light
In my heart tonight
What would I say
If given a day
What would happen
If I could have him
What joy it would bring
To hear him sing
What would I feel
If he were here for real
I miss him each day
That he is away
I miss him looking out for me
The way it used to be
I miss his love
That protected me like a glove
I miss him
So much it's made my heart dim
I wonder if he still cares
That's a question that tears
I wonder what he's like
If he'd tell me to take a hike
I wonder if he fears
That I don't hold him dear
But most of all
I wonder if he still loves me
Or if I'm just a memory
Of what used to be
Life frozen or caught on fire,
why does it matter?
Cut deep or shallow scratch,
in narrow alleys with a patch of darkness.
Falling up or getting down,
a cup of glass cutting our throats.
Mass collections of suicide notes,
and a small amount of hope.
Falling into death in deep with darkness,
seeking thought or maybe not.
Going in circles with out a fight,
not slavery and so far out of sight.
Loss and false hopes binding us down,
its our cost of not being found.
Sounds of voices peek in our heads,
fallen asleep deep in our beds.
Graves of memories found in our dreams,
deep dreams filling with passion and rising with action.
Faith calling and showing our fates,
knowing of death and full of hates.
Sedating our minds and lost hopes of love,
kind and gentle thoughts of warmness,
Killed our fate of endless fought circles,
lonelyness found here between worlds.
The sound of calling,
found and falling.
Now I’m watching over you,
because I cut it way too deep,
don’t worry I’m still watching you,
I watch when your asleep,
I know you miss me so much,
and you loved me with all your heart,
but I’m in a better place now,
and you cant tear it apart,
you don’t have to worry now,
I’m with some of our relatives,
just don’t do what I did,
and you shall live,
I’m always around you,
and always on the inside,
I’m in the wind,
in your dreams,
anywhere you seek me,
just have the time of your life,
and don’t cut it too short,
take in every second, minute, hour,
because you’ll never know when you’ll
end up where I am
The silent car ride,
The tearful eyes
The day I finally died inside.
The blood soaked wrist
And the glistening knife
Were the things that
Should have ended my life.
They rushed me off
To the hospital that night
A place for people
Who lived in fright
The horrific white walls
The tensions cold air
The children crying out
In their pain and wear
The dark room
My roommate and I kept
Was the one that haunted me
Every night when I slept.
The blood that was drawn
I still painfully lack
It haunts me these days
To ever look back.
Ten therapy sessions
Each day and night
So overwhelming
I wanted to fight.
The bolted windows
The locked doors
The imprisoned children
In the psychiatric ward
Letters from loved ones
Saying I love you so much
Them saying they need me
And miss me and such
I open the closet
In the bedroom
So plain
The door filled with
Carvings and drawings
And names
A phrase carved into
That old wooden door
It read Kelly died here
And I could not ignore
To this day I wonder
If that Kelly is alright
If she has fun with friends
Or has sleepless nights
I remember that day
With the glistening knife
The blood soaked wrist
And the horrible life
I still walk on
With my head held high
As I think of the
Day I died inside.
When you find a friend you say wow
'cause you think this friendship will never end.
You go places with them, talk on the phone.
You think you got your own little zone.
Until the day comes those friends can be deceiving.
They find friends that to them are most pleasing.
They leave you alone thrown like a dirty bone.
That's why you should pick your friends carefully
or you'll be thrown carelessly.
Algebra begins with an unknown.
To solve the problem,work must be shown.Parentheses are added to make problems look harder,but you can still do it, because you are much smarter!
The next day you learn coefficients and terms.You get confused,and say you'll have to adjourn. When you get back, you have a new mission,properties of numbers, using addition!
Exponents and factors are the new step,
but all of a sudden,you came down with strep! The day you return, you feel like trying,properties of something called multiplying!
Dispersing of candy is done very proud,
little do they know,one was missed in the crowd.The distributive property was explained very well,by the blank looks on faces, you could certainly tell!
Equations of numbers were taught left and right,finding the unknown,which was clean out of sight!Adding the opposite, or something diverse,every second that passed, the problem got worse!
Much anguish we just could not avoid,
because the amount of homework really got us annoyed!Solving more equations, ended the frivolity.No matter what, there was inequality!
Combining like terms, and variables on each side, searching absolute values, we looked far and wide.Simplifying numbers, where does it end? Positive, negative, then drawing a graph! By the end of the year, I'll have had enough Math!
The clouds move on, the earth turns grey;
The happiness I felt, has quickly gone away;
The whisper of the wind, seems to call my name;
I try to respond, but it seems I'm not the same;
Time elapses slowly, into the universe;
It's definitely not a pleasure, nor is it a curse;
Nothing seems to matter, no one seems to care;
I reached out to touch you, but you're not really there;
Everything I see, and everything I feel;
Sometimes seems like a dream, where nothing there is real;
I grasp onto reality, and try to play this game;
But every single thing, always remains the same;
The mist is finally fading, the truth is here to stay;
The illusions are finally passing, the lies have gone away;
But reason cannot save me, tears will not heal;
I've giving it some time, to see what will be revealed;
No one has the answers, no one holds the key;
I’m wishing for a miracle, that you'd belong to me;
Until then, I’m lost with my solitude;
Lost in this window, with no view.
Can you tell me is it a half lie or half-truth? I can't believe either, wondering if I'll make it through or give up and die. Oh, how I wish I could fly from the one I see starring back at me, in a mirror, reflection of a heart rejection misrepresentation of the truth looking back at these nonresponsive eyes. Unreal, can't feel, open up the banana and peel through the callused skin, hoping it's still soft with in, that it doesn't go on forever never reaching the end, that things will change around the next bend. Sitting on the edge, but how I want to make a pledge to the God of kindness and love, oh can't hear him or feel him, but I still know the dove, Holy Spirit above is calling out to me to fall down and cast my crown, forget the wheel and turn in the keys to the real King of all, the one Creator of love, Jesus Christ, my only chance, my only hope for deliverance. Second chances, do they still matter? Do they still work? But as I fall asleep and dream I known that His life answered the mystery. The blood will clear my mind and wipe away the history, cleanse my dirty robe draw me close to the sustainer and intercessor who is ever making cries for my soul, for my heart, to heal the wound from this terrible dart of mediocrity, pacify, sitti'n down and wondering how I'll get out of the mess on my own. It's impossible, and I know it, so here I go to my knees, and cry please, open my heart!!!!! Heal the wound from the dart, soften the hard, lukewarm heart and bring me back to you Father. Oh, why did I bother to strive on my own for so long, when You were the one calling out from your depths so strong, with a voice of discipline, a voice of love, never letting go of this child you deeply love. Help me see, how you could possible delight in me. Pull back the shades, and clear the clouds, that I might see that you hear me, your near me, with your arms opened wide, calling me away my from my selfish pride. Oh, let me say it's died, as I hear you cry it is finished!!! And see the stream run free a river of pure blood you spilt for me, from a pure heart who became the sin, oh how could I possible ignore this unceasing love and not let you in. I open the door, oh please come in !!! I open my heart; oh touch the hidden depths within. Deep calls out to deep as the healing water flows from the wondrous heart of an all compassionate savior, now king in this once hard heart, that is being broken apart and shaped into the pure loving home for the King of the ages, for forever I will sing his praises as I fall on me knees and hand him the keys to my heart, allow him to captivate as he shows me my part in this never ending Romance, oh this is but a tastes, a few sparks of what will be. I surrender to his gracious and loving rule; passionate reign from this throne centered around the cradle of my inner most parts. He created me to hear his whisper and know his heart the secrets spoken; only heard from the ears in my deepest parts. Oh receive me in your loving embrace as I race, run to your wide open arms and hear you say “I've been waiting my child, always waiting and watching with tear filled eyes longing for you to look up and see my ever open loving eyes and come to my side.”
Briars and thorns do snag and tear thee
all along the narrow way;
Which do fester and delay thee
in thy walk from day to day.
Uneven path doeth trip thee often
in thy journey throughout life;
Trials, placed there by adversary,
take their toll, exact a price.
Friend and foe alike assail thee
for decisions thou hast made;
Leave thee bruised, forlorn, forsaken,
unsupported, oft betrayed.
Weary feet move slowly onward,
heavy heart in depths of gloom;
Struggling, falling, heavy laden,
expecting naught but dreary tomb.
But then HIS voice calls out unto thee,
gently urging "Follow me,
take thy cross and follow onward;
for I have trodden where thou be."
And in the joy of thy companion,
God the Spirit, blessed friend,
pain recedes, black night departed;
Only matters pleasing HIM.
The reality is
That we will be together
No matter what anyone says
We don't need there belief
To make us grow stronger
Because we will make our relationship last longer
Longer than longer
Forever times 10
How many guys does a single girl meet when they try
Hundreds but the right guy will meet you
The right guy wont try
The right guy was him
He didn't try
I didnt cry when we first went out
You were the guy that brought me to a high
Without drugs or weed
Our happiness our love is all that we used
And to tell everyone thats the thing that will pull us through
Its a big world
and our relationship grows
All the way from your head and down to your toes
Thats everything that i love about you
And i know thats everything that you love about me too.
haiz.... mid-yr coming.... got such a lot of stuffs 2 do.... my classmates oso lyk dunno wat lohh.... poiema even got a "timetable"?!?! omg... at least my test is better than some of my classmates... =)
siann.... nth 2 watch on tv one... hardly anybody online... yeah.... i wanna haf more DMC outings!!! only if samantha go lohh... =P if not nobody to seat wif... den sooo boring... nid 2 sit wif the seniors....
the dmc outing on saturday was NICE! aha.. samantha n i were sitting on the beach while the rest take photos lohh... well, we were NOT lazy.... it's bcoz we finished taking the photos alr... sooo sian... the guys fm bedok sumthing skool were lyk so good lohh... everything oso got praises lohh... so unfair... shi qi and nicole onli go 4 photos aft an hr or 2's time... and the 4 photo onli y consist of those they took in the CC... miss chia gonna b very angry...
aft the trip, we've got a spider, praying mantis, ants, and a hse fly.. hhaaaa...... so cute lohh... the ants were fighting over dunno wad.... 4got 2 bring my cam, mp3.... my bag oso like soooo small.... scared the water leak... den everything wet... but everything went on orderly..... ppl so jealous tat we got 2 sit.... and they got to run after the birds.... hehe.... the bird looked weird... the wing lyk got no feather...
after we finished the course, sam, the friendly senior and i played pool... =P played for like 1 and a half hr den sam got 2 go.... it was raining... so the other girl was playing wif me 4 another 1/2 hr... den we decided it's late alr... we we packed up and went back lohh... =)
btw, the guys were playing during part of the course.... and they dunwan 2 let us play... soo unfair lohh.... there was karaoke too... eeww.... i dunwan 2 join... so crazy one.... @ the end nobody sing.... the trainers were there singing... i dunno how they sing one lahh.... but it was so disgusting....
lived a life and
dreamed a dream
and loved the life
you lived with me
then in the whisper
of a breath
you left,
and then I died
a death
`i lived a life and
dreamed a dream
and loved the life
you lived with me
then in the whisper
of a breath
you left,
and then I died
a death
Though I chose death instead of pointless pain,
Please forgive the manner of my leaving.
My love and need for all of you remain.
I could not long such suffering sustain,
Nor would it long have held you from your grieving.
Though I chose death instead of pointless pain,
I hope that choice will not my memory stain,
Nor lead you to be wroth at my deceiving.
My love and need for all of you remain.
For only in you do I live again,
Woven like a wind into your weaving.
Though I chose death instead of pointless pain,
I put to you the plea of the self-slain:
To comprehend an anguish past conceiving.
My love and need for all of you remain
That all that I have been not be in vain,
But blend into the earth of your believing.
Though I chose death instead of pointless pain,
My love and need for all of you remain.
In Death I See Life
In Life I See Death
The Sweet Relief That I Long
The Hush Of Whispering wings
Have come to Take Me
Away, away
Lydia
sweet 13
digital matrix club ( photography )
sac
poiemain
|I Won't Be Lost Again|You Gave Me Hopes|And You Destroy Them|You Lifted Me High|And Then You Let Go
memory_hurtz@hotmail.com
[[ My Adores ]]
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'movies!
'drawing
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[[ My Detests ]]
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[[ My History ]]
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x hui xiang
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x karwing
x annee
x suhaila
x Tharshini
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x abigail
x daphne
x vanessa anne
x rachel
x De qi
x Evan
x poiema photo web
x poiema main web
x ASE web
x zhen yu
x Chanel(1)
x Chanel(2)
x Qi hui
x Jia en
x Terence Goh
x funny christian stories
x biblebell.org
x inspirationalstories.com
x danielle
x chan ying
x aboutbibleprophecy.com
x Dmc webpage
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